(no subject)

[xp_darcy]

Ugh, okay, FINE I'm finally to the point where I need sparring partners for hand to hand (which I am just starting) and teaching me how to break holds. Any takers?

Advantages: You get to feel me up without taking me on a date first, and also the joy of watching me fall on my ass. You might get food or beverages as treats, no promises.

Disadvantages: You have to listen to my trash talk and deal with my competitive streak.

Comments

[xp_banshee]

I'll not be teaching you a thing, but I'm happy to feed you afterward.

[xp_darcy]

You're a wonderful woman.

[xp_cypher]

lmao like I don't use trash talk as a fight strategy myself.

Plus I need to get back into shit now that I have, y'know, ACTUAL ENERGY to do things.

[xp_wildchild]

I'm prob not your speed (no shame there's a reason I get the intermediate folks) but I can throw pointers - used to date a woman with your body type, so I mean I don't have 'em but god I know what it's like to be kicked by a person with your hips.

[xp_darcy]

You and your little asphyxiation helpers. 😉 But yes, absolutely. The more people I can learn from the better?

[xp_darcy]

You could teach me how to break holds from dudes bigger than me? I mean, you're so tall that my feet would be dangling off the floor, but it'd be funny.

[xp_wildchild]

Yeah, but ima let Doug clear you first cause I wanna make sure you know the basics. You're not gonna learn how to break a grapple on a guy my size - easier to fight someone little first :)

[xp_cypher]

I mean, I could try and get them to apologize? Though it'd be more like getting them to apologize for their asshole cousins or whatever.

[xp_cypher]

oh screw you Gibney :P

[xp_wildchild]

If you don't wanna be trash talked about being a midget tell your nanites to make you taller

[xp_cypher]

[xp_wildchild]

Okay but do your little buddies know it won't work because dude
they grew you an arm
they could grow you taller bones

[xp_darcy]

Yeah, fair. The jokes, dude. And what am I if he's short?

I need a riser or a chicken partner with excellent grip to actually fight you face to face. And a pool, so I don't crack my skull when I fall.

[xp_darcy]

We're good as long as they don't try again without permission. I'm still a little suspicious though. This is like mind-controlling squid babies, 2.0.

[xp_wildchild]

You fight a guy my height you go for the knees. Knees only bend one way, you make them bend the other way the guy's not really fighting anymore unless he's REALLY dedicated to fucking you up.

I mean unless it's someone who heals like me in which case dude do not fight someone like me, just like, talk us out of fighting you or shoot us

[xp_darcy]

So I should flash you as a distraction? If a taser or hitting you in the dick won't, that usually does.

[xp_havok]

I think I came here to offer to be a sparring partner but this show is way better. I've got the popcorn out

[xp_darcy]

The more, the merrier... Ah hell, that just. Yeah, variety is the spice of life and all that. If I can handle the clown show, then I can ask Natasha for advanced lessons. :D

[xp_wildchild]

I mean ME me sure but then Terry'll probably scream you into the lake. guys not me ME, uh, no you should probably not do that. Just shoot them.

[xp_darcy]

I'll tell her I'm doing it first and ask her to record your reaction. 😇

I don't always have a gun on me, but I do always have my boobs. The unintentional weapon.

[xp_cypher]

I want it on the record that there are so many "title of your sex tape" jokes to be made in this thread.

[xp_cypher]

No Kyle, my nanites are not like those penis enlargement spam emails you get.

[xp_wildchild]

Yo man you said it not me

[xp_darcy]

Oh honey, that's low hanging fruit. Sex tape, biography, kinky side blog about sex, etc. Plenty of easy material here, and for once I'm not just talking about myself!

[xp_darcy]

Oh hell, can your nanites like. Basically function as a condom? A moving one?